Talk Dirty To Me

pemwin:

ladybowtheboo:

asobita-i:

Reblog for the last one

it’s a game show where everyone eats the furniture in a room and tries to see which is made of chocolate

So basically you’re telling me this is the best fucking game ever created

(Source: iraffiruse)

friend: *whispering* if you're stupid say "what"
me: what
friend: OH MAN
OH
OH DEAR FUCKING CHRIST
I GOT YOU SO GOOD, THAT WAS AWESOME
SWEET, SWEET DICKS IN MY MOUTH. I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED THIS HARD. EVER.
JESUS. JESUS HELP ME.
midnightsunn:

I really love this.

midnightsunn:

I really love this.

(Source: onherway)

— It took me 9 years to figure that out  (via sunsetkawaii)

(Source: slutsandsinners)


(Source: gaksdesigns)

(Source: geheimzinnig)

(Source: gaysexistheanswer)

mintiscream said: What's your career goal after college?

50starsand13bars:

moooncat:

Truuuue

moooncat:

Truuuue

(Source: possuidora)

coffeepeople:

There are two types of single people 

  1. desperately wants to be in a relationship
  2. desperately wants to remain single for as long as possible 

I am both.

(Source: acinemaspell)

theoriginalspike:

innumerablegibbons:

A woman got breast implants made of wood yesterday

It would be funny if this joke had a punchline

Wooden tit 

image

(Source: animal-colectivo)

sloth-grunge:

when your mom says she’ll just be a minute

image

mahramore:


shots fired

mahramore:

shots fired

(Source: anacondaxvice)

just-laff:

egberts:

if i ever met a genie i wouldnt wish for a million dollars id wish that whenever i bought something i’d always have the right amount of money to pay for it in my pocket

you are one of the great thinkers of our time